Not a Kick in the Goolies Vote?

Because I am a political anorak and a bit of a weirdo, I love elections.

Elections warm my bones, boil my blood and do things to me that are unmentionable on a family blog before the watershed.

But I am not very exited at the moment. The Euro elections leave me cold. I am fairly politically astute. I know what a bloody nose a poor Euro election result would give poor Mr Brown in the domestic setting. If Plaid, or goodness forbid, the Tories (or both) had more votes than Labour in Wales it would be seen as yet another historic moment in Welsh politics. Both - either - could happen, but only on a less than a 30% turnout. A superficial result for the winners a tragic result for European and Welsh democracy.

The European election should be as exiting as any other election.

The media is full of stories about what these Euro politicians do to us.

Apparently they decide how many holidays we are entitled to and how strong / sensitive our condoms must be.

They have a say on the European grants that are shared amongst our farmers and industrialists, how many fish we can catch in the sea and they decide how bendy our bananas are and how straight our cucumbers should be!

Important matters. I could give an opinion on any of these issues and generate a heated debate on them in the comments section of this blog.

But could any commentator tell me where any of the incumbents stand on any important EU issue? What is their voting record?

Despite being a political anorak and a weirdo I don't know!

Is Jill for or against bendy bananas? Has Eluned voted for or against fishing quotas? If these issues come up again which way will the new Welsh members vote?

Could anybody advise how I should vote, based on an EU manifesto rather than a Kick Brown in the Goolies Ticket?

No! Thought not!